Silliest Story Ever? What Writers Can Learn from Adventure Comics # 267

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All writers dread writing that one story that totally sucks – the one that starts out with the greatest idea ever yet turns out to be a turkey that, no matter how hard it tries, will never fly.

But fear not.  Even professional writers write – and publish – stories that leave readers asking “What was he thinking?” (or, less charitably, “What was he smoking?”).

Case in point: “Prisoner of the Super-Heroes,” first published in Adventure Comics # 267, December 1959, and available in several reprints, including Showcase Presents the Legion of Super-Heroes # 1.

The story was written by Jerry Siegel (yes, that Jerry Siegel – co-creator of Superman) and drawn by George Papp.

Written during the dawn of the Silver Age of Comics, when super-heroes were just starting to make a comeback after several years of declining popularity, "Prisoner of the Super-Heroes" was also published a few years following the enactment of the Comics Code Authority.  The CCA – the comics industry’s self-censorship mechanism – mandated that comics were for children and should be bland and inoffensive.

Still, inventive comics creators churned out classic stories and characters on a regular basis during this period, including new versions of The Flash, Green Lantern, and the Justice League of America. 

And then there’s “Prisoner of the Super-Heroes”.  What's wrong with this story?  Well, let's see . . .

Science Fiction Gone Bad

Here's the premise: Three members of the futuristic Legion of Super-Heroes (in the Legion’s second appearance) arrive in the present day and make Superboy look bad by upstaging him while he is trying to perform super-feats.  The townspeople, his foster parents, and even his dog turn against Superboy, who feels so bad he leaves earth.

The Legionnaires then trick Superboy into coming to an artificial planet, where they imprison him in a kryptonite cage.  The reason?  Historical records of the next few years of Superboy's life were incomplete until a recently invented device called a futurescope shows what is supposed to happen: In five years, Superboy will turn evil, destroying a U.S. aircraft carrier, an airstrip, and a factory.

The Legionnaires, therefore, have come back in time to imprison Superboy for crimes he has not yet committed.

Well, who wouldn’t want to travel back in time and prevent Adolf Hitler, Al Capone, or Mohamed Atta from committing their acts of evil?

But what might have started out as a thoughtful science fiction tale quickly deteriorates into an implausible plot filled with characters acting in bizarre ways and a deus ex machina ending.  “Prisoner of the Super-Heroes” reads like a rejected Twilight Zone episode (though Twilight Zone thrived on the bizarre).

The Superboy Smear Campaign

Think politicians have it rough when their opponents denounce them in the media?  That’s nothing compared to what poor Superboy goes through.  As part of their plan to make the Boy of Steel leave earth, the Legionnaires thoroughly discredit him, first by upstaging him when he tries to help others and then (through the telepathy of Saturn Girl) turning his foster parents and even his dog against him. 

And these are supposed to be heroes?

Others have pointed out that, in early stories, the Legionnaires don’t act heroic – particularly toward applicants who try out for their club.  Still, the dirty tricks the Legionnaires display here could have taught Tricky Dick Nixon a thing or two.

J’Accuse!

The film Minority Report features a horrific account of what might happen if police could predict a murder before it happens and can intervene – not only to save a life but also to send the would-be perpetrator to prison.  Sounds like paradise – until the system is abused and people who might think about murder but would never actually commit one are sent away. 

Alas, such a well-developed premise eludes this tale.  Since the Legionnaires can travel through time, all they had to do was make a pit-stop five years into Superboy’s future to find out if the events depicted by the futurescope are accurate (hint: they’re not).  Fans of later eras have concocted several explanations for why the Legion didn’t do this (e.g., time travel was new, so they could target only specific years), but such explanations are absent from this story. 

First lesson of the day: It's the writer's job to think the story through, not the reader's.

But, you may say, this was a children’s story.  It wasn’t meant to be taken seriously.

Children’s stories should be taken seriously – by the writer, at least.  By all means, be as wacky and as imaginative as possible.  But even children’s stories should make sense.

Later Legion stories (including many written by Siegel) contained a mixture of silliness and seriousness that appealed to both children and adult readers (and which has helped sustain the Legion in publication for more than fifty years).  Fortunately, few of them are as wildly implausible or ill-thought-out as the Legion’s second outing.

I won’t reveal how the story ends, just in case you want to seek out any of the numerous reprints and experience it for yourself.

A Silver (Age) Lining?

Yet perhaps Siegel (and editor Mort Weisinger, who co-plotted and had final say over all Superman-related titles in those days) was thinking of his audience after all.  The story plays upon several common fears children have, such as being ostracized, abandoned, and punished, and even children's fears for how they might turn out when they grow up.

And like most Silver Age stories, "Prisoner" turns out all right in the end.  Superboy even forgives the Legionnaires for their nasty deeds – a lesson we could all learn.

What can writers take from this story?  Siegel went on to write many more Legion stories and to lay the foundation for the series fans know and love, showing that even our worst stories can serve as building blocks for better things.

For Further Reading: 

• Fan review of Legion of Super-Heroes Archives, Volume I.